Friday Favorites--My Favorite Post About Infant Sleep and Scheduling

When my little P was an infant--I became the master Babywise type mom. I totally believed wholeheartedly in scheduling you baby's day. I believe that P was a much happier baby because she was thoroughly rested. I also believe that she learned how to fall asleep. Even though, this may seem like an easy skill--it's not necessarily that way. I had the hardest time falling asleep well into adulthood. My child doesn't have any issues with sleep, and I believe it stems from the techniques I used in her first year of life.

One of my posts about scheduling is my most pinned post from Pinterest. That is why I have decided to write this post. I can totally understand why people are drawn to my post--all new moms are desperately searching for anything to help them sleep more!

Below I have linked my favorite posts on sleep training and sample schedules that I used for my daughter.

I would love to hear about your sweet babies and what you have found to work for them. My husband and I are currently considering and planning for Baby #2 and I need to re-learn all over again!

1. How To Get Your Newborn On A Schedule

This post is a general tips and tricks post on how to start out. It includes the basics of how to start as well as addresses some FAQs.

2. Why I Did Cry It Out

This post is on one of the most controversial parts of sleep training and scheduling--cry it out. I try to talk about it in a humorous way. I know that lots of parents have a hard time with this, but I swear that it works. I include some tips and tricks in this one as well.

3. Sample Schedule Posts

Below I have linked my daughter's sample schedules for her first two transitions. These should help you moms out there that like to be prepared for the future.

Weeks 7-10

Weeks 10-15

4. Introduction of Solid Foods With Scheduling

When I introduced solids her schedule seemed it change a bit. It definitely make life a little bit more difficult.

5. Schedule from 6-9 Months

After starting solids my daughter's schedule held steady for a long time. This was the longest stretch that she went without changing it up from time to time. She became pretty predictable and oh-so-happy!

I hope you enjoy these posts!
Caroline

Please Eat!

The past month has been CRAZY, hence my lack of posts. My little munchkin just turned 6 months old (sigh), and we just got back from her first beach trip.

I was so excited to start P on solid foods I could barely contain myself. However, as we approached the middle of her 5^th month something started changing with my girl—she stopped sleeping through the night. UGH! I had been warned about the 4 month sleep regression, but could it really be a while month and a half late? P was waking in the middle of night and staying up from one to two hours. I am just not prepared for this type of sleep deprivation anymore. When she was a newborn—I expected it. Now, not so much.

I started rummaging the internet for ideas on what it could be, and some people said it may be her way of telling us that she is ready for solid foods. So I went out and bought three sweet potatoes, three bananas, and 5 apples. I was so proud of myself while making my homemade baby food. I was hopeful that she would fall in love with the first bite and sleep the whole night through. WELL—she didn’t!

We are struggling mightily with solid foods. She may open her mouth for a bite or two, but then she is done. I have tried homemade, store bought. We have tried rice cereal, oatmeal cereal, applesauce, peaches, sweet potatoes, and bananas. While she will take some better than others (peaches, apples, and sweet potatoes), most of the time she closes those gummy gates and say no thanks! I was frustrated because I really thought that I needed her to eat these solids so that she would sleep more.

Then I read that it probably would not affect her night sleep—so I started to look at her schedule as the culprit. Maybe my baby was just ready for more awake time during the day. At the time she was still taking 4- 90 minute naps a day. I decided to drop her to three naps and also move her to a four hour schedule with three attempts at solids a day. Here is what it looks like:

7:00—wake and bottle

8:00—solids

9:00—nap

11:00—wake and bottle

12:00—solids

1:00—nap

3:00—wake and bottle

5:00—catnap

6:00—wake and bottle

7:00—solids

7:30—bath and then bedtime routine

8:30—Bottle and then bed time

I would like to tell you that this has been an easy fix, and a pleasant transition—but that would be a lie. P has still not returned to sleeping through the night consistently. She does it here and there. Part of her problem may be teething related as well. Who knows? It is better now, because when she wakes in the night she is not getting up and staying up anymore. She takes a little bottle and goes back to sleep.

It seems that my girl is a little too interested in all of the things going on around her lately—and this interferes with her eating drastically. She has become a nightmare to feed. She will never take more than three ounces at a time. Gone are the days when she would eat 30 ounces a day. We are lucky to get to 25. Therefore, she wakes to get some calories at night. I have tried everything I can think of to get her to eat. I offer the bottle what seems like every 5 minutes. She refuses it most of the time.

I guess I can’t complain—my girl is happy all day long. She is a joy to be around in general. She is still chunky as well (she is 2 pounds from tripling her birth weight).

Have any of you dealt with eating issues with your 6 month olds? What did you do to combat them?

My Tips for Exclusive Pumping Moms

 Exclusive pumping is a hard job, and it is not one to be undertaken lightly. I definitely didn’t know what I was getting myself into in the beginning. Now, that things are getting a lot easier for me on the pump front—I thought I would share a few of my tips.

FAQ—these are questions that I had when starting my exclusive pumping journey and the answers that I have found that work for me.

Q: How long should I pump?

A: This is really a tricky one because some people prefer to pump a certain amount of time, some have an volume goal they are trying to reach, and some just pump until empty every time. The answer is different depending where you are in your current pumping journey (and I do consider it a journey).

If I am having a hard time with my supply, then I will pump until empty every single time for a few days. This (to me) means at least 15 minutes or up to five minutes after the last drop. You do not want to do this for too long because your nipples will be really sore.

If I am not concerned about my supply and just want to maintain where I am, then I will pump towards a particular volume goal. My current goal at least 6 ounces per pump.

If I have somewhere to go and don’t have as much time, then I may set my phone timer for 15 minutes and then just cut it off. However, I never pump less than 15 minutes. EVER.

Q: How often do I need to pump?

A: this again is based on where you are in your journey with pumping. In the beginning I was pumping 6 times a day because my baby was eating 6 times a day. However, I eventually got to the point where I was producing almost twice what she was taking in a 24 hour period. I was running out of room in my freezer for all the extras and milk was starting to go bad. So, I cut out a pumping. This is where I currently am in my journey. P still has 6 feedings a day, but I only pump 5 times. I am still able to keep up my supply and her demand plus I am able to save about 6 ounces a day.

If you are just starting out, then I would say that you need to pump as often as your baby eats. Keep a notepad near where you pump/feed your baby with two columns on it. One for the number of ounces your baby takes at each feeding, and one for the number or ounces your pump for that feeding. Add the up at the end of the day and see where you stand.

Q: How do I cut out a pumping without affecting my supply?

A: I cut out a pumping by just increasing the amount of time between pumpings. If you are currently pumping every 3 hours, then start pumping every 4 and cut one out that way.

How Can You Make Exclusive Pumping Easier for You?

This is the biggest issue with exclusive pumping—it is inconvenient. One of the hardest things with pumping is that you are tied to a machine with a plug, and it can make it hard for you to get out. For instance, we have a white water rafting trip planned, and I am going to need to go 6 hours without pumping. This is not ideal, but I am going to have to figure out a way to make it work.

Here are the things that I have found to make my life easier while pumping

1.       Get a hands free pumping bra—This saved my life. I am a work from home mom, and when my husband is not home there are times that I have to feed P and pump at the same time in order to be as efficient as possible. I picked up a hands free pumping bra and I will never hold the bottles while pumping again! It allows me to have my hands free to hold P or work while pumping.

2.       Get a car adapter for your pump—I have pumped in the car while driving and while being a passenger more times than that can count on both hands. It makes getting out of the house so much easier. When I have a makeup job, then I pump on the way there, and then on my way home. The adapter saves me from having to pump while I am there! It also makes date night a lot easier.

3.       Get extra pump parts and extra bottles for storage. Getting these extras will just mean that you have to wash less.

4.       Pack your pump bag the night before when you can. It is often a mad dash getting ready to go somewhere in my family. Therefore, I like to pack everything up ahead of time if I can so that I will not forget something important.

5.       Grab some Medela steam bags for quick sterilization for pump and bottle parts.

6.       Get some quick clean wipes for cleaning your pump on the go.

Here is what My schedule with pumping currently looks like

7:00 am—Wake P and feed

7:30—Pump

8:30—P’s nap

10:00—Wake P and feed

11:00—pump

11:30—P’s nap

1:00 pm—Wake P and feed

2:30—P’s nap

3:00—Pump

4:00—Wake P and feed

5:30—P’s nap

7:00—Wake P and hubby gives P a bottle while I pump

7:45—P’s cereal feeding

8:00—bath time

8:30—P’s bedtime

10:30—Last pumping of the day

11:00-P’s dream feed

I hope that these things help you exclusive pumpers out there! I wish you the best of luck and the most encouragement I can. I know we all need it!

Pumping My Brains Out—Exclusive Pumping Pros and Cons

Since P was eight weeks old I have been mostly pumping for my girl. If you are unfamiliar with my story of what happened to our breastfeeding relationship, then you can read about it here. Up until two weeks ago, my little babe was still breastfeeding whenever she woke in the night (rarely) and first thing every morning. NOW—she has even stopped doing that. So I am an exclusive pumper. I feel like I am in an AA meeting or something. Hi—my name is Caroline and I have a problem—I am an exclusive pumper! This is not something that was even on my radar when I signed up for the whole breastfeeding gig. I am a little bitter about the whole thing—can you tell?

Nevertheless—I thought that writing about it may help some of you out there in cyberspace. So here is a little look into my world—the good and the bad. This post is not a how to, but (sadly) more of a gripe post.

I would like to say that pumping was a calculated decision—but I just jumped right in. For those of you who like to make decisions based on Pros and Cons—here is how I see it.

Pros

·         P still gets my breastmilk—I mean isn’t that the overall goal here. To make sure that she gets the nutrients, antibodies, hormones, etc?

·         Breast milk is the most nutritional option.

·         It may keep her from getting sick

·         It may make her IQ higher

·         I still get the benefits—protection from Cancer and weight loss and maintenance

·         It is cheaper than buying formula --I am not ashamed to say that this is a factor me and my hubs. You may think less of me for that—but I secretly think that all parents think about the money side of it even if they aren’t willing to admit it.

Cons

·         It’s not as intimate—I mean you are literally hooked up to a machine 4- 7 times a day

·         It’s painful—especially at the end of the day.

·         It’s time consuming—P can drink what I am pumping in less than half the time it takes for me to pump it out.

·         It’s inconvenient—This is the hardest part for me. I can’t go anywhere without the pump now-a-days. So now I am lugging around a diaper bag, and a bag with my pump, pump parts, bottles or bags to pump into, cooler with ice packs, quick cleaning wipes to clean the pump…and a partridge in a pear tree. Oh, I forgot about the baby in the carrier too. That means I am only leaving if I absolutely HAVE to! For those keeping track—I need like 10 hands.

·         I can’t wear anything cute—this is because lots of my shirts wont stretch enough for the pump parts to fit comfortably underneath. This means that I either have to pull my shirt practically off or just wear baggy clothing all the time.

o   Let me tell you this story—the other weekend I went to my cousin’s college graduation. While at the graduation, I had to walk all the way back to where we parked our car to pump (in the rain). Then, since I was wearing a dress I had to practically pull it all the way up over my head so I could reach the zipper enough to pull it down. Once I pulled it down, I had to sit in the car essentially topless facing the road where cars and people were walking around. YOU CANNOT MAKE THIS STUFF UP. Then, after graduation I had to pump in the car with four other people because we were stuck in traffic and I was already an hour off my schedule.

·         It takes quality time away from my daughter—During the day when  J is at work, I have to feed P a bottle and pump. While, I have found a way to do the two at the same time—it has gotten very hard to do so. P is far too wiggly to sit in my lap while I pump. This means that most of the time I have to have her entertained in some other activity while I pump (or pump while she naps). Before you know it—the days become one pumping cycle after another. It’s monotonous and I HATE IT!

·         You have to wash dishes CONSTANTLY—I have storage bottles, regular bottles, nipples, pump parts, and spare pump parts. All of these things have to be washed daily.

·         

I realize that  this post has become one big complaint, but this is the truth. It is how I feel. During the last week I have been seriously considering giving it all up and switching to formula. I go through cycles where I want to—and then I change my mind. My hubs is very supportive. He says, “we can start buying formula whenever you want.” Then he also says, “However, it seems like such a waste of all of your hard work.” On both accounts he is right. I can switch whenever I want, and it won’t mean that I am a bad mother. On the other hand, I have put two months into breastfeeding and two more months into pumping. It would be a shame to give it up so easily.

When I went to P’s 4 month check-up, I had hit rock bottom. I went into that room thinking that I was going to ask her about switching to formula. We went through P’s stats, and she asked the big question, “Are you still breastfeeding, or has she been receiving any formula?” I told her that P stopped breastfeeding at 8 weeks, and I had been pumping ever since. The doctor smiled at me and went on to say that she admired me so much for the commitment that I was making to my child. She told me what I was doing was harder, in many ways, than breastfeeding naturally. I am sure to her, she just thought that she was giving me a simple compliment, but to me it meant a lot more. She had empowered me to fight through for another day.

As a mom, there are so many days that we can feel defeated. For one reason or another—things are just hard. Therefore, any day when someone seems to give you clarification that what you are doing is right—it is a damn good day. Validation is powerful for mothers like myself. Every once in awhile I get that validation from a friend, stranger, or doctor—and it helps give me the strength to make it to the next day. Sure, It would be easier to give it up. Believe me—I think about it every single day. Today, I thought, “maybe I will stop at 6 months.” It’s that little trick that I used to use when I was working out. Only five more minutes, then I can stop. Well, only two more months then I will stop. Honestly, I may make it to 6 months and think, “maybe I will stop at 9.” Whatever works, right? Or—perhaps I will stop next week, tomorrow, Saturday. I really don’t know.

Where are my other exclusive pumpers out there? How did you handle it?

Cry Baby, Cry!~ Why I do Cry It Out

             

 Crying it out is a method that is very hotly debated in many households and other parent forums across the world. People have very strong feelings about this topic, and it can be a polarizing one.  I learned that this past week when an angry mom posted on my Facebook page. I do understand that by putting my thoughts, ideas, and practices out there in a blog opens me up to criticism-- I fully accept that fact and encourage good discussion from those who read my writing. However, I do expect that discussion to come in a respectful manner. I guess it is just the nature of the beast sometimes. If you have a very strong feeling about my last post or if you were offended in any way—I hope to explain myself in greater detail. I should have known better than to have posted that manual without first diving into my beliefs on Cry it Out and Babywise.

                I do not feel that I owe anyone an explanation for why I have chosen this method with my daughter. She is my daughter, I am her mother—it is my choice. I will not criticize or judge you for the way that you choose to parent your children. I am a firm believer that women could rule the world if we would just stop criticizing each other so much. I think one of the worst groups with this is mothers. If we did not raise our child a certain way, or if something did not work for us—then we believe that it is not the best way or that it does not work for other mothers. This is SO not true. I am fully aware that the system that I use may and will not work for some babies. I know mothers in my Mommy and Me group whose babies would not fit into this system. I use Babywise because after observing my child over her first month of life—I deduced that it would be beneficial for her. That is all! That is the reason.

                I could sit here and ramble off studies about Cry it Out and psychological development. There are countless articles that claim both sides of the coin. Here is the deal—I am not a Pediatrician, Psychologist, or expert in infant development. For this reason—I am not going to make statements that only these professionals should make. You will not hear (or I guess see) me talk in absolutes here. I will say that something may or can be, but never will or is. That is how babies are. They are not exactly identical. What works for some will not work for others. This is why moms cannot judge other moms. We are not dealing with the same product here. All we can do is what we feel is best for our individual child. Ok, rant over. Here is what I do want to say about my routine/philosophy with Baby P.

                When I first heard of Babywise, I too thought that it was a bad thing—I then I did my research. I read several blogs, articles, and the book itself. I made the decision that this could work for some infants if –and only if—several things were present. For instance—I do not believe that CIO would work for babies that are having significant colic or other major issues. I do not believe in letting a baby in pain cry. If you are a mother for any significant amount of time you know that there is a difference in the cry of an infant who is tired, hungry, or in pain. I would NEVER let my child continue to cry if she was in pain. PERIOD! Secondly, I think that CIO should only be done if you are also sleep training/schedule training your child. I have already talked about this in length and why I have chosen to do this with my child. You can read that post here.

Here are some common misconceptions about Cry It Out

1.       Cry it out is not a substitution for feeding a baby.

a.       I don’t know where this idea comes from, but when your baby is hungry, you should feed it. That is just common sense. What CIO does is to make sure that your child is actually hungry before you feed them. I have had many a friend tell me that their child was waking up at night—but would not eat when they tried to feed them. That is because they are not hungry. Babies do not only cry when they are hungry. Sometimes you may need to go down the chain of the many other likelihoods before finding the culprit. CIO maintains that sometimes babies wake up because that are used to and conditioned to wake up for feedings—and that they will continue to do this even when they do not need or want the calories. CIO is a means to break this sleep habit.

2.       Cry it Out does not mean you let your child cry for long periods of time every time they cry.

a.       I only let P CIO when I know that she has a full tummy and clean diaper. Even then, I go in and try to redirect her every 10 minutes. BTW—I think she has only ever cried for 10 straight minutes once. She usually always falls asleep after a minute or two of fussiness.

3.       Cry it Out does not mean that you just put the baby in the crib and walk away leaving them for hours and hours.

4.       It is not a substitute for parenting.

a.       When your child is hungry, wet, or sick—you may not want to let them cry for very long—if at all.

Here is what CIO means to me:

1.       CIO is a sleep training method that helps to train my daughter how to fall asleep and fall back asleep

2.       CIO is a way to send a message to my daughter of what is or isn’t acceptable night or nap time behavior.

All CIO is for me is a way to set limits of what I will or will not do during the night or naptimes. Babies can quickly associate things when it comes to sleep such as nursing to sleep, rocking to sleep, replacing pacifiers etc. These things can become sleep props for your child, and can start to really wear you down over time. I did not want my daughter to have to have these types of things in order to fall asleep because I knew I would not always be able to provide them for her. I do not want her to always have to eat in order to sleep for instance. For this reason—I think that CIO is great for breaking these types of habits.

Here is a good example—if your child hates the car seat and starts to cry while you are driving—you are not going to pull over and take them out. The baby is not hurt by the car seat—but is just unhappy. Eventually the baby will learn that it cannot just cry and get out of the seat. The same thing applies if your child does not want to fall asleep without being rocked. The baby may cry because they are frustrated that you will not rock them back to sleep, but eventually they may fall asleep on their own. The crying is just a way to express frustration. It is not hurting them.

In my case, Piper would wake up and cry at about 5 every morning. I would try to resettle her, but she would not fall back to sleep on her own. I would finally take her out and try to nurse her, she would eat for less than a minute before falling asleep at the breast. She was not hungry—she just wanted to be soothed back to sleep. While I loved the idea that she would nurse in the middle of the night (because she won’t any other time),  I knew that I was not prepared to do this each and every night. So one night she woke at five—I went in and re-swaddled her, gave her the pacifier, and turned on the mobile. I then left the room. She cried for about 5 minutes before she fell back asleep. The next night she did the same thing—I did the same thing. Then the third night she slept through to 7 am. She didn’t wake because she needed the nourishment—she had taken 27 ounces during the day. She had just woken herself up moving around in her crib and couldn’t fall back asleep on her own. On that third night—she did. I was so proud of my girl!

So that is why I do it. I hope now you understand it better. You still might think that it is harsh, mean, or cruel—but in the end—it works for me. What types of tricks do you have for helping your child sleep?

Houston, We Have a Problem--dealing with low milk supply

In a recent post on my friend's blog I wrote about my issues with breastfeeding Baby P. It was a hard post to write, and one that I struggled with very much. As I continue to struggle with mommyhood, I find that blogging really helps. So, bear with me as I gripe about my newest issue--my low milk supply!

Once my milk came in, Breastfeeding got a lot easier, and I thought that it would continue to get easier as the weeks went by. It did--for awhile. However, at week 5 P stopped taking my breast. The reasons--at the time-- was my overabundant supply and super quick letdown. Well, I no longer have either of these issues, but what I do have is something much scarier. A low supply!

In mommy groups all over the world this is the dreaded issue. We don't all face it, but for those of us who do, it is the most nerve-wrecking feeling in the world. The fear of not being able to keep up with your child's hungry demands is enough to drive you half crazy--or maybe all the way crazy.



I should preface this by saying that I am now exclusively pumping for P. She will not take the breast well. Occasionally we will have a good day where she will breastfeed 3 or four times in a 24 hour period, but most days she feeds at the breast once (the first feeding of the day). I have come to terms with this, and I am okay. I won't say that there are times that I don't miss it, but I am okay with it now. On days that she breastfeeds more, she usually does not sleep through the night. At this point, I choose sleep. So--bottles are not the devil, ladies! They can be a very good friend.

Since P was 8 weeks old, I have been exclusively pumping. My supply actually started to increase during these weeks because she had not been nursing very well. Then, last week--BOOM. It TANKED! I was used to getting 8 ounces after breastfeeding P in the morning (your optimal time) and then 5 ounces each time after that. I was pumping 7 times a day, and P was eating 7 times a day. It was a great system. I was building up my freezer stash, and had actually run out of space in the freezer. I had to outsource to my parents and in-law's freezers. I was cocky, proud, and oblivious that all of this could change. So--it tanked hard. I woke up one morning, and was only able to pump 4 ounces at my first pumping. WHAT? That was half of what I normally got. It only got worse throughout the day as I was only able to pump 2 ounces at each pumping for the rest of the day. I panicked. Then I reached for a bag of frozen milk out of my freezer.

Once I calmed down, I searched the internet frantically trying to find out what had changed. I figured out that the culprit was the fact that P had started sleeping through the night. She is now sleeping 8 straight hours at night (feel free to throw something at me virtually)! I wasn't getting up anymore at 12 to pump. My body had overcompensated for the dropping of that feeding.

What was I to do now? I had heard from several other mothers who had gone through similar issues with their little ones so, I did know what to do. Just in case you don't--here is a list:

1. Drink more water, and then drink some more. It is so so so important.
2. Don't skip meals--I was really bad about skipping breakfast in the mornings. I had gone back to work and found it hard to keep up with the demands of morning time with a baby.
3. Eat better--Leafy green vegetables are shown to help with lactation. So be like Popeye! Also, oatmeal is said to boost supply.
4. Take supplements--Fenugreek and Blessed Thistle! I swear by these. Take three Fenugreek capsules three times a day and one Blessed Thistle capsule three times a day.
5. Drink less caffeine--it's known to dehydrate you faster. Just substitute it for water until you are back to normal.
6. Pump more often and for longer periods of time. In my case I added back one pumping session to get back to 7 (so I don't have to get up in the middle of the night). Then I lengthened my pumping times from 15 to 20 minutes.



After doing all of these things, it started to come back--slowly but surely! I started to relax, but I am all too aware now that this could happen again, so I am going to try to be more cognizant of what I put in my body, and how shifts in her schedule could affect my supply.

I want to also say that in times like these--we tend to overreact. Thank god I have a level headed husband who helped to keep me sane. He kept pointing out that while the amount I was getting was significantly less than I was used to, I was still keeping up with P. In fact, I was still staying ahead of her by at least a half an ounce at my lowest point. This really helped to keep me calm. Shout out to you babe! You're the best!

I was terrified of having something else taken away from me. I already was unable to breastfeed my child the way that I wanted to. I definitely did not want to have to give her formula. I am determined to do whatever I have to do to ensure that she was getting breastmilk until she is one. In the end, I know that formula is not the devil. It is more about pride and stubbornness in my case. I want something to go my way--even if it means I have to invest more time and effort into it. However, I understand that sometimes things are beyond our control. If for some reason my supply dries up, then I will find a way to cope with it, and I will shake that bottle of formula with a smile on my face and know that it will be okay.

Have any of you had a low supply? How did you deal with it? Did you have to switch to formula?

To Breastfeed or Not to Breastfeed, That is the Question

Throughout history, breastfeeding seems to cycle in and out of popularity.  Presumably breastfeeding started with the first baby, and in ancient times was the only option a mother had for nourishing her baby. However, somewhere along the way breastfeeding came to be looked at as a practice for the lower classes. Instead, the wealthy often hired wet nurses to nurse their children. This practice lasted until the bottle was introduced in the early 20^th century. When my mother was pregnant with me she was discouraged from breastfeeding by my father and many of those around her. My father was not too keen on me being tied to my mother’s breast. I guess that he thought this would hinder her (and maybe him) from having a full social life after baby. When I became pregnant, I felt that there was pressure on the other end of the spectrum. If you do not want to breastfeed, and are brave enough to say so out loud; you can often feel judged. I am a big believer that moms should support each other and should not be so quick to judge others. Motherhood is the hardest job, especially during the first few weeks and months of a baby’s life. Women need the support of others in their same situation, and not the judgement that they so often receive.

With that being said, this post is about why I chose to breastfeed. I hope to outline to you my thought process when deciding to breastfeed. I also hope to shed some light on what that first month of breastfeeding is really like. I don’t want to scare anyone away, but I do want to be honest.

Why I Chose to Breastfeed Baby P

1.     Bonding

When I was doing my research on breastfeeding in the early stages of my pregnancy, I read a lot about how breastfeeding helps you bond with your newborn baby. I remember feeling slightly skeptical of how breastfeeding could really bond you closer to your baby than motherhood in general. Is that to say that a mother who exclusively formula feeds her baby will not be as bonded with her child? I think not. Does it mean that her child will be less bonded with her? I also think not!

What I will say is that breastfeeding does require an incredible amount of closeness with your baby on a whole other level than bottle feeding. In the first days of your baby’s life you will feed them on demand. It can seem around the clock. What I found, once breastfeeding was well established, was that I yearned for that time with my child. As good as it felt to sometimes get a break from Baby P (if only for my nipple’s sake), I found myself counting the hours till it was time for her next feeding. I fell in love with her scent, her warmth, and the sound of her sweet wheezing as she nursed at my breast. Therefore, I am no longer so skeptical.

I have also read that babies who have been exclusively breastfed will wake more throughout the night when their mother is away from them during the day. They do this in order to get in that one on one breast time. This seems like a good indicator that it creates a strong bond between baby and Mom.  I do not doubt that breastfeeding leads to a strong bond between mother and child, but I do not think that not breastfeeding will mean that the bond is any less strong.

2.     Immunities and overall health of the child

There are countless studies confirming that breast milk can help reduce childhood illness. This is a fact, and not something that should be overlooked. For me, this was the number one reason that I wanted to breastfeed Baby P.

I was formula fed. I was also a very sickly baby. I had multiple ear infections that resulted in two sets of tubes. I still get ear infections. I also had gastrointestinal issues that have followed me ever since.  I am not saying that the sole reason is because I was not breastfed. I am not even saying that they are related. However, when I thought about my unborn child, I thought that I would do anything to save her from the possibility of having these same issues. If breastfeeding her for 3,6, 9, or  even 12 months could prevent pain for her, then I would certainly bite the bullet. It seems like a small price to pay for the comfort of your child. This was my line of thinking.

3.     Benefits to the mother

Studies have shown benefits to the mother when breastfeeding. Perhaps the most awesome benefit is that it helps your uterus return to it’s pre-pregnancy size much quicker. This means that it will also help you lose that pregnancy weight and get your sexy back! I should mention that this is not a reason alone to breastfeed. I have heard many a friend say that they wanted to breastfeed just to lose the weight. What they don’t realize is that breastfeeding is really rough. If this is the only reason you are doing it, then I fear that you will be setting yourself up for failure.

There is also evidence to suggest that breastfeeding reduces the mother’s chances of getting breast cancer. I think we can all agree that this is a win-win situation. If it lowers the risk, then that is certainly a plus in my opinion.

Financial Reasons
I will never say that I chose to breastfeed Baby P because I wanted to save money, but this is the reason that my hubs got on board with the plan. He was not always so excited about the thought of me being tied down to the baby to the extent that breastfeeding requires. However, now he is all about it. When he saw how much cheaper this baby was then my stepson (formula fed), he was very supportive of my feeding plan. 

The Truth About the First Month of Breastfeeding

            Here is the awful truth; Breastfeeding is HARD. I mean, it is really hard! It is especially rough in the first few days. Here is why. You are exhausted after just giving birth, you are inexperienced, your baby is inexperienced, and your milk has not come in. All of these reasons are reasons that many mothers stop breastfeeding before they even leave the hospital. Here are some things that you can expect in the first few days and weeks of breastfeeding:

1.     You nipples will be sore, and I mean SORE.

They will get dry. They might crack and even bleed. It will get to the point that the thought of letting your newborn suck on them will bring a tear to your eye, and actually letting them nurse will bring them streaming down your cheeks. Here is the good news, you get used to it. Once your mature milk comes in, baby doesn’t have to suck so hard to get their meal. Then, you start to feel some relief.

How do you bide the time until the milk comes in? Buy some nipple cream and use ice packs or heating pads depending on which feels better for you, Always remember that it is totally and completely okay to cry.

2.     Your baby will lose weight.

This fact was very hard for me while in the hospital. My nurse made a huge deal about how Baby P had lost 7% of her birth weight (they like you to stay under 5%). Here is the scoop—all babies lose weight while in the hospital. Also, since the baby weighs such a small amount. Just an ounce could be the difference between 5 and 7%. Therefore, I shouldn’t have been too worried. I was almost pressured to give Baby P formula because of the nurse’s remarks, and for nothing. Within 7 days of birth, P had regained all of her weight!

So what do you do? Stick to your guns! Once you get home, start to watch your baby’s output—count their dirty diapers. At four days old, your baby should have 3 to 4 dirty diapers and around 5 wet diapers a day. This is after your milk has come in. If your milk has not come in by 7 days postpartum, then you should contact your doctor and consider some kind of supplementation for your baby. There are some women whose milk just never really comes in.

3.     You will feel like you are nursing all the time

In truth, you kind of are! In the first three weeks you should feed your baby when they are hungry. This does not mean waiting until they are crying. Early signs of hunger include lip smacking, rooting, and hands near and in the mouth. In my case, Baby P naturally wanted to nurse about every 2 ½ to 3 hours. I knew that I wanted to get her on a schedule pretty quickly, so this was perfect for me. Starting at week 4 I worked on getting her to follow my schedule. I woke her in the morning at a time I decided on, and she ate every 3 hours throughout the day.

So how many times will you feed a day in the first few weeks? 8-12 feedings. Until your milk comes in, try to get your baby to nurse 20 minutes on each side (BTW—this is hell, and why your nipples will be so sore). Once your milk comes in, try to get them to nurse 10 to 15 minutes on each side. If you are doing the math that is about 160 to 360  minutes daily that you should be feeding your baby. I can never get Baby P to nurse longer than 20 minutes total. This is because she is able to empty my breasts fairly quickly. Every baby is different, so just do what works for you.

4.     Your baby will be very sleepy

Newborns are very sleepy, and this causes a problem when you need them to eat. I have a hard time getting Baby P to stay awake long enough to take a full 10 minutes at each breast. This is very common for babies in the first weeks of life. However, if you are wanting to establish a schedule, it is important that your baby takes full feedings. There are several things that I have found to work with my babe.

1.     strip them down to only their diaper.

2.     Change diaper in between breasts

3.     Burp after each breast or if baby detaches before taking their 10-15 minutes.

4.     Swivel or rotate baby’s head while nursing. This rubs your nipple along the roof of their mouth and stimulates the sucking reflex.

5.     Compress/massage the breast while nursing. This squirts milk into baby’s mouth and stimulates sucking reflex.

     

 You will be extremely hungry and thirsty

            This is because you are using extra fluid to produce your breastmilk. You are also burning calories like crazy. You should drink about 8 ounces of water every time you nurse. This will replenish what is being taken. Do not drink too much, though, because that has been shown to reduce your milk supply.

            Make sure that you watch what you eat while breastfeeding. You should limit caffeine and spicy foods. There are some foods that are linked to stomach issues in infants. They include: milk products, peanut butter, peanuts, and onions. Try to limit these things until you are sure they do not affect your baby.

6. Your baby may develop reflux

            Reflux is characterized by spitting up a good amount after each feeding, and painful passing of gas and stools. Baby P would arch her back and be very fussy after eating. Your doctor can prescribe medication for your baby, but may recommend you cut out some of the above mentioned foods from your diet.

For those of you who are on the fence about breastfeeding, I recommend that you do your research. The hospital where I delivered Baby P had a free online breastfeeding course. I learned so much about holds, latching, breast milk storage, and countless other things in this course. I also read countless breastfeeding blogs and Pinterest articles. You really do not want to go into breastfeeding unprepared. I know a girl that did not have any idea about breast milk storage. She had absolutely no stockpile after three months of breastfeeding. This made her very tied down to her little one. I also am a BIG fan of Mommy and Me groups. It is a huge comfort to talk to other Moms who are going trough the same things.

I hope that this post has shed some light on breastfeeding. My goal is that you all use it to make an informed and educated decision for yourself and your child.

Hugs,

Caroline

P.S. Here are some pics of Baby P...You know, just because she is beautiful!