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Wednesday, March 29, 2017

Raising A Princess in Social Media World


"Mommy, I don't want to be smart, I just want to be pretty." -P

When I found out at my 20 week ultrasound that my baby was going to be a girl I was elated. I had secretly been hoping and wishing that I would have a girl. I'm not really sure why, but that is just what I wanted. When it came to fruition--I gasped in delight. Truly, I would have loved a baby boy just as much, but was hoping for a girl. My little P is everything that I had ever dreamed that she would be, and many more things that I didn't even know that I wanted. She truly is everything!


When I was a little girl, I used to dream about my adult life. AND nothing is like what I thought it would be...Except for my daughter. She is exactly the child that I had always pictured. A green eyed, brunette, with wavy hair. She is quite literally my dream girl. I fall more in love with her each and every day.

Over the past month I have started to think about the values and beliefs that I want to convey to my daughter through her childhood. I make a mental note each time she does something that scares me. For example: look both ways before you cross the street, say SHE instead of Her when referring to a friend, don't pick your nose in public (or at all), don't eat your boogers in public. Those are mostly little things. BUT I stress over dropping the ball. I am constantly worried that one of these little golden rules that I managed to grab in my childhood will be lost in hers. Then I wondered, why do I feel this way?


I truly think it is because of many factors, but mostly because of social media and the media in general. Everywhere you turn girls are confronted with social media posts that send them conflicting images of what a woman should be. That wasn't as prevalent when I was young. I am worried that the messages I am trying to send my daughter will get lost in a sea of information on social media.

This feeling started about a month ago on the way home from school one day. I was making chit chat with P on the way home. She had been struggling with tracing her letters at school and I was trying to reassure her. I mentioned that tracing would make her smart. She responded matter-of-factly, "Mommy, I don't want to be smart, I just want to be pretty."


My heart broke into a million pieces for my perfect baby girl who is so so beautiful. I knew that this wasn't something that she was getting from me. It is something that she has taken in from those around her, and from the images she has seen on TV and Movies. That is not what I want my daughter to believe--that you have to be beautiful to succeed.

While I tried to reassure her that she is beautiful and that there are more important things in life than being pretty. She kept repeating the same mantra over and over. I mean--Am I over reacting? I don't think so!

So I have really focused on giving her daily affirmations. I comment on the way she looks, but I make a conscious effort to comment when she does something intelligent. I point out when Belle on Beauty and Beast talks about loving to read. "See Piper, Belle is very smart. She loves to read."

I wasn't sure if it was actually working though. I just want so badly for her to be the strong willed little girl that I know her to be. AND I know that she is. I am terribly afraid that she will be send signals that she needs to cater to those around her, and that she shouldn't speak up for herself and what she feels is right out of fear that it might,"cause a scene."


Then last Friday night I got the sign that my affirmations and talks were having an effect. We went to P's Spring Fling at her school. We were waiting in line for the jumpy slide and a woman tapped me on the shoulder.

She said, "I just wanted to let you know that you are raising one tough girl." I asked her what she had witnessed. She said that she walked into school to pick up her child and had witnessed another child push her child all the way to the ground and then head on a rampage over to my child.


As he started to push Piper down--she shoved him right back exclaiming, "don't you push me down! That's not nice!" She then preceded to tell him to apologize to her and the other little girl that he pushed.

I had to hold back the ugly tears from escaping my eyes, because I was so proud of her. I was always the type of child (and adult now) that let's people walk all over me and bully me because I am afraid to hurt anyone else's feelings. NEVERMIND that they had hurt mine! My daughter stood up for herself and her friend. That is exactly the type of woman that I want her to grow up to be.

I hope that it continues to blossom as she grows and that she doesn't loose that quality.

For those of you with girls, how do you plan to try to combat these messages with your daughters?

Until Friday!
Caroline

Monday, March 27, 2017

Tyme Iron Tutorial and Review


This is the first beauty tutorial I have done on the blog. I am so excited to make this a weekly thing! Disclaimer--I have not been compensated by the Tyme people. All opinions are my own completely!

So let's talk about the Tyme iron. It has been all over Facebook. It was haunting me daily. So I put it on my Christmas list last year, and I got it! It took me a good 3 practicing sessions before I had it down, but now it is the only hair product I ever use on myself. No more curling irons, and no more straightening irons. I just use the Tyme iron and I am set for both waves and straight! How cool is that?

If you are interested in getting a Tyme iron. You can purchase one here.

Here's the thing--we as humans to do not have a long attention span--so a product, no matter how great, that has a learning curve often gets shoved in the back of our cabinets in the bathroom and forgotten! That is why I wanted to do a video tutorial and post here about my experience with the Tyme iron. View my tutorial below if you already have the iron--or if you're just curious, or thinking about purchasing.


And now for my review!

1. Price
The Tyme iron is $189. That is a little bit pricey, but as someone who has bought Chi irons for years, it really is not that much more.  Many curling wand systems are in the same price point. I guess when you consider that the iron is supposed to take the position of both a straightening iron and a curling iron, then it would warrant that higher price. BUT I will admit that I used my Chi iron to curl my hair too, and the results were not much different.

2. Packaging and Quality
the Tyme iron comes in really sturdy and nice packaging. It arrived unharmed and in a timely manner. I have been using this iron consistently for over a year, and it still works just like it did the first day. It is well made.

3. Performance
The Tyme iron makes beautiful smooth curls and can straighten just as good as any other straightening iron I have ever used (and I have curly hair so I have used a lot). It has sucessfully replaced my other irons completely.

My one issue is that you cannot control the heat setting on the iron. It comes in one setting (F******* HOT). So if you are one who worries about heat damage--this might not be the iron for you.

4. Overall
Overall I love this iron. I use it weekly and I even use it on clients. While it does take time to learn how to use, I do think that it has superior performance.

Do you have a Tyme iron? If you don't, then maybe you will consider investing the next time you are in the market for a new tool.

Till Wednesday!
Caroline

Wednesday, March 22, 2017

Words for My Daughter



Over the last few months I have been slowly piecing together ideas for Piper's new "Big Girl" room in my mind. For the last year she has been sleeping in a toddler bed, but I am well aware that she is ready to graduate to a "forever bed." As silly as that sounds. We are preparing to get her room ready and appropriate for a young lady. Something that will be appropriate for a little girl, but that can grow with her into her teenage years. I can't believe that I just typed those words.

I have picked out some furniture in my mind, and the paint color I want to use. It will be elegant and sophisticated, yet appropriate for this beautiful Princess that it will hold.


During this process I have become obsessed with wood framed art pieces. I know that I want a pretty large piece to go over her new bed. But I couldn't find the right phrase to put on it. I wanted something that would again grow with her into young adulthood.


While scouring Pinterest, I had a hunch to search for quotes from one of my favorite authors, F. Scott Fitzgerald. Anyone that has read The Great Gatsby knows that his work is very romantic and whimsical, yet thought provoking and quite sad at times. While reading through the multitudes of famous quotes from his work, I came across this portion from The Curious Case of Benjamin Button, and I just stopped searching further. As I read it, my eyes welled up with tears. I knew that this was exactly the wish that I had for my daughter's life each day.



These words truly express the type of individual that I want to raise. One that is strong, kind, friendly, caring, and intelligent enough to be true to herself first and foremost. They will be the words that will hang over her sweet head each night as she sleeps. I pray that they will stay inspirational and relevant to her all of her life.

I wanted to take the time to share them with all of you, because this is also the wish that I have for all of my friends and family. May these words ring as true to you as they have for me.

Happy Hump Day,

Caroline

Thursday, March 16, 2017

Where Are You Summer?



Life has been so stinkin' crazy around here. I mean, let me be honest, I have been a big slacker in the blogging department lately. It's mostly due to the fact that our lives are so chaotic in the winter months that I feel like I barely have enough time to do my jobs (educator, wife, and mom) much less tell you all about how I am flailing daily. AND I do mean FAILING too. I can't wait for summer to come so that I can have time to relax and catch up on some good quality family time.


My life in January becomes an endless cycle of dropped balls. Add in my husband's soccer, my experience coaching Mock Trial this year, P's two new activities each week, and my mom's recent hip replacement surgery, and I'm just reeling from the stress. There is never enough time to do anything, and yet, when I get time all I want to do is lay like a vegetable on the couch and watch The Bachelor or something equally ridiculous. Please tell me that I am not the only one...Anyone?


Since Piper's Birthday time has just flown by. She is such an amazing little ball of energy. I fall more in love with her each and every day. I am loving how vocal she is lately. She will often compliment me on my outfit or tell me that my hair is pretty. One of her new favorite names for me is sweetie. I'm not sure where that comes from. She is so full of love, and spunk all at the same time.

Her Birthday party was spectacular. It was my best creation yet. Here are some pics of the things I created for it. This is by far my favorite thing to do all year! It is a labor of love, and one way that I choose to show my love to my daughter. I hope she looks back on these pictures one day and is proud of the work that I did for her.









My mom recently had hip replacement surgery, and while I went down for the weekend, I really wasn't of much help. My dad took fabulous care of her, but I won't lie. It is a scary thing to have a parent that is ill. It is a reminder of the fragility of life. One that makes me have nightmares at night.

Photo taken by P herself!

I turned 30 last week, and I didn't meet it with much kindness. I wasn't looking forward to it. We went out to dinner as a family of 3. It was nice and quaint, and just how it should be. I am going to Vegas this summer for my 30th with my besties from High School to celebrate. I cannot wait. Confronting the idea of getting older is something that is new to me, and it is something that brings a ton of fear into my mind. I am not quite where I thought I would be by 30. BUT I am so incredibly lucky to have the life that I lead each day.



I constantly struggle with the what's next in my life. So much of growing up is about getting through these milestone in life. You are always looking forward to what is next. Always thinking, "What do I have to do to get to this next point." Now in my 30s--I am struggling with what is next in my life. I have a career, and a family--So what is next for me. It's the uncertainty that I don't like.


So until then I just pour myself into this little piece of perfection that I created. I try to focus on providing new and great experiences for P. Ballet and Gymnastics. Playdates with friends. Trips to Disney World. Maybe, possibly, hopefully a sibling to grow up with. Teaching manners, and good habits. Trying to curb the temper and hard-headedness that is already grasping her three year old self. Molding, shaping, hoping, and praying that the decisions I make and will make are best for her. I guess that is what is next for me. Still I know, no matter what, that it will never be enough, yet it will also never be too much.



What do you think?

Cheers!
Caroline